Catching-up

It has been a while since I put fingers to keyboard. I have been working on my yoga studies. During our Sunday class 2 weeks ago we sang, I tried to sing, the Gayatri Mantra. This is a very beautiful chant and there are a ton of YouTube videos. My favorite is the one by Enigma.

Here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDnamSM3Z3s

The Mantra in Sanskrit

ॐ भूर्भुव: स्व: तत्सवितुर्वरेन्यं भर्गो देवस्य धीमहि, धीयो यो न: प्रचोदयात्

AUM BHOOR BHUWAH SWAHA,

TAT SAVITUR VARENYAM

BHARGO DEVASAYA DHEEMAHI

DHIYO YO NAHA PRACHODAYAT

which translates to:

Oh God! Thou art the Giver of Life,

Remover of pain and sorrow,

The Bestower of happiness,

Oh! Creator of the Universe,

May we receive thy supreme sin-destroying light,

May Thou guide our intellect in the right direction.

I have started to read daily from Meditations fron the Mat by rolf Gates and Katrina Kenison. It consists of a daily reading about some aspect of yoga. The first section is on the yamas. This mornings reading for me was about renunciation. This has to do with "practice [abhyasa], and nonattachment or renunciation [vairagya]. Basically, this means that "yoga practice is doing the work, it is following up your intention with action".

The reading continues and discussed the concept of practice not being a substitute for renunciation. This means that while asana and pranayama may change how you feel, relaxed, full of energy, it does not teach us what we need to know to mature spiritually. As the author states "renunciation is the acid test; it is walking the walk".

What does this mean? Well, to me it gets to the point: for me to really benefit spiritually, I have to admit to my "old" behaviors and renounce them, make a commitment to change. Yoga is our support for this.

The reading concludes with the following important thoughts to remember:

"Once we take the first step of renunciation, our practice nourishes us as we are reborn."

Practice without renunciation is avoidance

Renunciation without practice is not long-lived

Together practice and renunciation make all our dreams possible"

These are powerful statement. My take on the above is that "yoga practice without renunciation is empty; it is hypocrisy in practice".

Ruminate on this for awhile.

namaste

mary

Ahimsa, Satya, Asteya

Well, since this is the time for ahimsa [non-harming], satya [truthfulness], and asteya [non-stealing], it has been a tough week.

First I injured myself on the very day we discussed non-harming. My ego, no doubt, because going further is the ego, not yoga. Then satya; you can't have ahimsa without satya [truthfulness]. So, first one has to practice non-injury in thought, word or deed before one can practice truthfulness. Satya is "speaking the unpleasant in a pleasant manner, to not cause harm in your speech".

Today I was focusing on ahimsa and satya as my yoga practice. It is hard to be compassionate and truthful without causing harm. I was in the midst of a potential conflict, my word versus a co-workers word, and I thought about saying "what do you want from me right now", per Ms. Lassater, but I could not do that because I felt that would be against ahimsa and cause more anger on her part because she was already defensive. So I acquiesced and said that it was worked out and no longer an issue. I guess that's ahimsa but is it satya??? Tough question...

Healing

I am still caring for my shoulder. I have not done any down-dog, table, chaturanga [my nemesis], cobra, or other asanas which involve pressure on the shoulders. I have been doing one-arm warrior asanas and one-arm chair pose and some leg asanas. It does not have the same feeling as the full asana, but I derive spiritual and physical benefit in terms of muscle experience and breathing.

Tomorrow I am going to practice poses on the mat which strengthen the abs. It is kind of difficult to restrain myself since I am such an over-achiever but I am working on the yogic mind and yamas so non-harming is my first priority.

I have lots of reading to complete but it is weird to complete text work without a corresponding yoga practice. It seems to lack a vital quality of practice and meditation on what I have read. It all flows together.

I am thinking alot about satya, truthfulness. This is tough. How many times have I made comments or statements which are true but are phrased in a manner to be pleasant or non-harming to the receiver of the statement when I really want to say what is on my mind???

I read a verse from somewhere that said "say what is pleasant, do not say what is unpleasant but say what is pleasant in a manner which is pleasing to the receiver". It is like the good news, bad news but said in a pleasant manner. I have been trying to do this at work but it is hard to re-orient myself to this approach.

Yamas are hard to incorporate into my life. The world does not routinely do this; I am trying to.

Namaste, practice ahimsa and satya....

Mary

Namaste

Mary

Ahimsa

I made it through the Sunday 4 hour training class. The theme, coinciding with our training topic, was ahimsa or non-harming. This includes compassion, not only toward ourself but to all those around us. When you think about this it is pretty overwhelming, at least it is to me. It means being compassionate to all persons you come in contact with, it means not saying unpleasant things to all persons [family members, co-workers, people at the grocery store, anyone you interact with]. It also means that one stops the negative self-chatter going on in our brain which can be so destructive.

In the physical sense, it means that you do not engage in acts or behaviors which can be harmful to yourself. Things like, alcohol, smoking, eating meat, all those things which we enjoy. It means taking care of yourself and not engaging in anything which can harm our psyche or physical being. This is intense; everything we do, all those around us, we must treat in a non-harming, compassionate manner. Think about this for a minute: how many people did you interact with today? How many of those times did you interact with ahimsa? Hmmmmmm, not as many as you think.

How ironic that during the asana period on Sunday, I popped my shoulder. Was I giving into the negative self-talk that I'm not good enough, I too short, too heavy, not flexible enough to do yoga? I was working on going from down dog into chaturanga and was trying to get my elbows into the right angle when my hands didn't move but my body did and then it happened. Hello, ahimsa, was what I said to myself. What was I thinking??? I can't do this at home, why would I think I could do it in class?? Because the self-chatter prodded me along and I fell into the trap.

Hello, ahimsa!!! compassion!! acceptance of me and where I am.

Yoga is about where you are, it is not about getting further, holding longer, reaching higher. It is about where you are, a journey into yourself and acceptance. For me this is the hardest part. I read a line in one of my assignments, it goes like this: "going further is the ego, this is not yoga". Does this sum it up or what???

Just remember: "Ahimsa is not causing pain to any living being at any time through the actions of one's mind, speech or body" Atharva Veda, Shandilya Upanishad, 1.3. UPA, P. 173.

See, it is intense.

Along with ahimsa is satya, or truthfulness, internal and external. OWWW that is scarier than ahimsa. This includes refraining from lying to ourselves, to others and betraying promises. This is our next topic...more on that later.

Right now I have to go do some reading...

Namaste

Still moving

How ironic that this title is "Still Moving". It did not occur to me as anything more than meaning still moving along, but as I started to write the first sentence I realized that it can be interpreted as still moving, "being still or appearing to be still but moving within stillness". Wow, what a thought for today. I'll have to remember that.

I have just finished Section 1 and an starting the next which is "The Eight-Limbed Path". This section is about Yama, Niyama, Asana, Pranayama, Pratyahara, Dharana, Dhyana, and Samadhi.

Yama, niyama, asana and pranayama are external practices which can be taught. Pratyahara and dharana are internal practices which must be experienced individually. The last 2 limbs are the innermost practices which occur as a result of grace.

Our yoga yesterday was "Yin Yoga" and is very different to what we have been practicing on the mat, Yang yoga [or muscular yoga]. The focus of yin yoga is to practice poses which stretch the connective tissue. These poses are done with the muscles relaxed and should be held for a long time because sonnective tissue does not stretch like muscle nor does it respond to brief stresses. It also is a good preparation for meditation.

Some information about Yin Yoga from http://www.yinyoga.com/ys2_1.0_how_to_practice.php. This is a very informative site, visit it if you desire.

The Three Tattvas of Yin Yoga Practice

A tattva is the reality of a thing, or its category or principal nature. Sarah Powers offers us three very simple and very effective principles for the yin practice.

Come into the pose to an appropriate depth
Resolve to remain still
Hold the pose for time

Remembering these three principles as you practice will simplify everything. Knowing when to practice is a different matter.

Yin Yoga deliberately targets the deeper connective tissues. To be most effective we want the muscles to be relaxed. If the muscles are warm and active they will tend to absorb most of the tension of the stretch.

When we do our Yin Yoga practice early in the morning, the muscles have not yet woken up; this is why we feel so stiff when we first wake up. In the same way, doing our yin practice before an active yang practice allows the stretching to settle deeper into our tissues.

By the end of the day our muscles have been warmed up and are at their longest. The physical benefits of a yin practice will be fewer at this time; however, the psychological benefits may be greater.

The daytime is yang. A yin practice, before going to sleep, may balance this energy. Similarly the spring and summer are yang times of year. When life is busy, when we spend many hours traveling, these are all yang times of our life. Balance is achieved when we cultivate yin energies.

During a woman's menstrual period she may naturally find a yin practice beneficial. On the other side of the coin, a yin practice is not recommended when we have already been very placid. After sitting at a desk for eight hours in the dead of a dull winter's day, a more active practice may create balance much better than a yin practice. Listening to your inner guide may give you the best answer to the question: is this a time for yin or yang?

A word of wisdom: Going further is a sign of ego; it is not doing yoga. Staying where you are is embracing yin.

Today, Sunday is our first group class. It is from 1PM to 5 PM and will include practice, vigorous we have been informed, clinic and then lecture and learning time. It will be intense for sure but good.

The class yesterday was our entry onto the eight-limbed path, the first being ahimsa: non-harming, compassion. First one has to practice ahimsa toward oneself. That means stop that negative self-chatter that is so poisoning. I find that I do that more than I am conscious of. I was reading in the book Living Your Yoga by Lasater that she kept a log one day of times she was not practicing ahimsa that day and it added up to more than 60 instances.

It is an important concept to get your head around because our culture makes us think that what we are or what we have is not enough. We have to be faster, thinner, prettier, etc, we are never good enough. I had that beaten into me through my childhood so I know how destructive it can be. I try to stop it every day, sometimes I'm successful, sometimes not, but the more conscious I become of it the more I will be able to stop the chatter before it starts.

Speaking of stopping things, I have become aware of some of my non-Yoga behaviors like impatience, being critical, judgemental, intolerance, and anger. When I catch myself, I correct this and stop it. Yesterday in class, the yogi made the statement that when we are on the edge of anger or about to say something non-yogic, stop, take a breath, observe the situation and your body's reaction, then respond. Sounds easy doesn't it? Harder than it sounds for sure, at least for me.

Namaste

Private #1

Today was my first meeting with one of the instructors. It was turn-in time for assignments and I had them completed. We discussed my collage, what each of the entries meant and what they meant to me. We talked about the class last Saturday and I commented that it was like "yoga bootcamp". I also commented that I did the wrong asana and that was not goooood. But it was fine, she laughed about it!

My evolving sadhana was reviewed and we talked about chair yoga at work, breathing and many different aspects of yoga and meditation in my life as well as when to fit them in. Then I brought up the discussion of yoga and ego from Saturday; whew that was a tough one. I have been thinking about this since class. I recalled my childhood and my father and my constant self-esteem problems and always feeling that I had to work harder to earn love. It was haunting to me to remember that. Then we went on to spirituality and religion and my spiritual inclination and affiliation. Well, I don't have an "affiliation" but I know I am spiritual. It is manifested in my response to the reading assignments and yoga practice.

I learned 3 ways to do a headstand and life is good!! I was encouraged to say "I don't know that asana" and to get the props I need to be able to make an asana my own regardless of what everyone else is doing. All I have to be conscious of is me, no one else. This is my Yoga and my path.

Words of wisdom from my readings:

- Ahimsa: nonviolence. Ahimsa refers to not harming others. If you igmore this you deny the ultimate benefit of yoga which is everlasting happiness.

- Sri Brahananda:

• Vocal injury is more serious than physical injury.
• Mental injury is most serious.
• Physical injury destroys only physical forms.
• By vocal injury one can destroy both physical and mental forms.
• By mental injury one can destroy even the form of spirit. Consequently, one will go to a lower transmigration.

The moral is: think many times before you speak once; vocal injury can destroy!!

Overall, it was a very enriching session. I learned new things, grew in my confidence and got to know the instructor a little more.

Sunday coming is our first group meeting/class from 1PM to 5PM. It will include some lecture, asana and exploration. I can't wait!!

More later.

Namaste

Assignments

Through the week I have been thinking about my 2 assignments for this week. One is to create a collage of symbols which reflect me and the other is to describe my Sadhana [practice}. Well, the first assignment was easier to complete because I just have to look around my home and see the symbols which are important to me. These include

• tranquility
• balance
• yin-yang
• OM
• Reiki Symbols
• vegetarianism

So my board is multimedia; some acrylic paints, pencil, printed word, and other accents. A little bit of color and alot of meaning.

The second assignment, the sadhana, is a little more difficult for me. I haven't fully incorporated a home daily "practice" yet so it is hard to describe. I am getting better at it but there are days when I am able to get in only some meditation. This, I believe, is because I have not disciplined myself.

However, I would describe my evolving sadhana as awakening early, ~5:30AM, opening the blinds to let the light of the rising sun into the house, sitting quietly and focusing on my breathing and reciting a mantra. I do this for ~10-15 minutes then do some stretching or asanas to generate some energy and heat to get my body going. The total time in the practice is ~15 minutes, just enough to awaken my body.

In the evening, after work, I have my evening yoga practice which includes initial focused breathing, asana practice for ~25 minutes then 10 minutes in savasana. My asanas vary on a daily basis depending on how I feel and how my day went. Sometimes I need restorative poses, other days I need to generate heat and work hard. Regardless of what my daily practice includes, I always end with a savasana.

It is weird though, as I move through the asanas, and start to prepare for savasana, it seems like only a few moments. When I finish and re-emerge, 40 minutes have passed. I think this is because I am "being" in the asana, not just doing it. I have been trying to feel the pose and the subtle effects each one has on my muscles, breath, mental focus.

I try to journal on a daily basis but even that is somewhat sketchy. I actually feel like this blog is my journal.

Tomorrow I have my first "private session" with one of the instructors. I am kind of anxious about it but I know it will be fine!

First "Official" Class

Well, today was the first training class. There were 2 other students there and 4 other regular Saturday attendees. It was different because the yogi was in the back of the class speaking to us and giving instruction, not really doing the asanas in the front for all to follow. It was strange but it worked out okay, I think.

Todays focus was the question "What is Yoga". I am still thinking about this. I think it is a peaceful mind, discipline, release, mindfulness, stretching of mind and body, moving beyond one's comfort zone, spiritual growth, integration of self, consciousness... Some of the words in class were said to help us acknowledge what our mind and ego thinks, I'm not good enough, why am I here, I'm fat, out of shape, all the negative thoughts we routinely have. But we are where we are and it is okay. It is our ego that works to make us judgemental and hard on ourself. It makes us critical of others, mean-spirited, whatever. But if you can let go of the ego, you can be accepting and grow personally and spiritually.

So, in the midst of pondering class at home I thought I would google "what is yoga" as our instructor asked. Well, there are a ton of hits!

Here is the first hit and the one that most corresponds to my thoughts about what yoga is: Per Wordnet Search
n) yoga (Hindu discipline aimed at training the consciousness for a state of perfect spiritual insight and tranquility that is achieved through the three paths of actions and knowledge and devotion)
S: (n) yoga (a system of exercises practiced as part of the Hindu discipline to promote control of the body and mind) WordNet

This is also very pertinent [from: http://www.iyengar-yoga.com/yoga/]

What is Yoga?
The Roots of Yoga
The word Yoga comes from the Sanskrit word "Yuj" meaning to yoke, join or unite. This implies joining or integrating all aspects of the individual - body with mind and mind with soul - to achieve a happy, balanced and useful life, and spiritually, uniting the individual with the supreme.

In India, Yoga is considered one of the six branches of classical philosophy and is referred to throughout the Vedas - ancient Indian scriptures and amongst the oldest texts in existence.The Upanishads are also broadly philosophical treatises which postdate the Vedas and deal with the nature of the "soul" and universe.

However, the origins of yoga are believed to be much older than that, stemming from the oral traditions of Yogis, where knowledge of Yoga was handed down from Guru (spiritual teacher) to Sisya (spiritual student) all the way back to the originators of Yoga, "the Rishis," who first began investigation into the nature of reality and man's inner world. Legend has it that knowledge of Yoga was first passed by Lord Shiva to his wife Parvati and from there into the lives of men.

The Aim of Yoga
According to the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, the ultimate aim of Yoga is to reach "Kaivalya" (emancipation or ultimate freedom). This is the experience of one's innermost being or "soul" (the Purusa). Then one becomes free of chains of cause and effect (Karma) which tie us to continual reincarnation.

In Kaivalya one is said to exist in peace and tranquillity, having attained absolute knowledge of the difference between the spiritual which is timeless, unchanging and free of sorrows, and the material which is not.

This is considered desirable as life is analysed as ultimately full of sorrows and pain- even pleasure and joy leave pain and loss when they have gone as nothing in the material world is permanent.

Yoga is therefore a spiritual quest. However, along the path of yoga, the aspirant also gains health, happiness, tranquillity and knowledge, which are indicators of progress and an encouragement to continue their practice. Buddhism and other Eastern spiritual traditions use many techniques derived from Yoga.

The Paths of Yoga
There are said to be 4 main paths (Margas), according to the Bhagavad Gita, by which to reach the ultimate goal of Yoga - "Kaivalya."

There is the path of Knowledge (Jnana Marga) in which one learns to discriminate between what is real and what is illusory, the path of selfless work (Karma marga), the path of devotion (Bhakti Marga) and the path of control of the mind (Yoga Marga) where all the activities of the mind and consciousness are studied and brought under control. From these have come the various paths of yoga which can be followed.

Raja yoga involves mastery of the mind and senses in Samadhi; essentially the advanced aspects of Patanjali's astanga yoga.

Hatha yoga is the yoga of the will which involves cultivating ones energy to arouse Kundalini primarily by means of asana and pranayama.

Mantra yoga involves reciting sacred syllables to reach perfection.

Laya yoga involves absorption in god to experience ultimate bliss.

Bhakti yoga requires absolute devotion to god to achieve the ultimate goal.

Karma yoga achieves this through selfless work without thought of personal reward.

Jnana yoga is the yoga of knowledge cultivating the discrimination between spiritual reality and the illusion of the material world.

It must be realised that there are no clear cut boundaries between these various paths and all draw on the practices and philosophy of the others; effectively all paths have the same goal and "tread the same terrain." They are different views of the same topic.

The Schools of Yoga
Various schools or styles of Yoga have grown around each of these paths, which emphasise different aspects of these paths, or a combination of them, in their practical methodology. Usually these schools are established by renowned teachers or gurus and reflect their methodologies and ways of practicing, teaching and following the path of yoga. Some of the most well known modern schools or styles of yoga include: Iyengar, Astanga, Vini, Ananda, Anusara, Bikram, Integral, Kali Ray Tri, Kripalu, Kundalini and Sivananda. (See this article for a brief explanation of the differences between some of these schools at a practical level in terms of how classes are run.) Interestingly, 3 of the most popular schools today - Iyengar, Astanga and Vini Yoga - were all developed by students of Sri T. Krishnamacharya.

Particular styles or methods may be considered more effective than others or may suit an individual's temperament better. That said, it must always be remembered that all these are merely different methods of reaching for the same ultimate goal. They are all aspects of the overall philosophy of Yoga.

The Philosophy of Yoga
The philosophy of Yoga comes from many sources and has been presented in many fashions with differing emphasis depending on the understanding of the author.

The Vedas and Upanishads give some of the earliest references to the paths of yoga. These scriptures form the basis of Indian religious practices but contain many varied references to yoga and other things.

There are the Puranas, also ancient, which deal with the nature of the universe.
Famous epics such as the Ramayana and Mahabarata contain stories of the gods and lectures on moral and philosophical subjects with references to yogis and yogic practices.

The Bhaghavad Gita is a particularly famous part of the Mahabarata which contains a detailed discourse on yoga by Krisna to Arjuna.

Other texts such as the Hatha Yoga Pradipika are more "technical manuals" of yoga which go into detail on technique as opposed to just the theory.

In general all these texts discuss Yoga from the particular standpoint of the authors and the paths to Yoga they have followed. In many ways this subject can be confusing for lack of a clear overview. This need is answered in the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali.

Yoga Sutras of Patanjali
The varied philosophies and methodologies of Yoga itself were clearly and methodically brought together and presented by the sage Patanjali in his set of 196 aphorisms called "The Yoga Sutras," written some 2200 years ago. The Sutras bring together all the various strands of theory and practice from all sources of yoga and present them in one concise, integrated and comprehensive text. How all the aspects interrelate and form part of the whole body of yoga are clearly elucidated.

There are 8 disciplines to yoga as presented by Patanjali (thus Astanga yoga - 8 limbed yoga) which must be practiced and refined in order to perceive the true self- the ultimate goal of Yoga:
Yama - Universal ethics

Non-violence

Truthfulness

Non-stealing

Sexual restraint

Non-acquisitiveness.

Niyama - Principles of self conduct: purity, contentment, intense dedication or austerity, study of self and scriptures and self-surrender.

Asana - practice of the postures.
Pranayama - Breath control.
Pratyahara - withdrawal and control of the senses.
Dharana - concentration.
Dhyana - meditation.
Samadhi - a state of higher consciousness where the sense of self (ego) dissolves in the object of meditation and the individual self exists in its own pure nature.

The key elements of all the paths of yoga are presented in a balanced perspective and legend has it that Patanjali was himself a realised being and so writing from experience. In the four chapters of his sutras he explains the levels of higher consciousness (Samadhi) which the aspirant must experience before reaching Kaivalya (emancipation) and the end of this world's spiritual pursuit.

The second chapter deals with the methodology which must be followed to reach Samadhi and the hindrances which may be encountered. The unusual powers that may develop are also described with the warning that their lure must be avoided, while the final chapter covers the achievement of Kaivalya in detail.

These Sutras were and are still considered a most profound and enlightening study of the human psyche. Patanjali shows how through the practice of Yoga, we can transform ourselves, gain mastery over the mind and emotions, overcome obstacles to our spiritual evolution and attain the goal of yoga: liberation from the bondage of worldly desires. Written in Sanskrit, many commentaries and translations have been written over the centuries by various scholars and practitioners; each interpreting as per their era and understanding

I was reading about Karma [what you think, say, and do] this morning. Karma means action; it encompasses movement of the body and mind, conscious or unconscious.

There are three types of karma:

1. Sanchitta: accumulated actions or karma waiting to come to fruition



2. Parabda: present action in this lifetime and its result. Take Sanchitta karma and work on them in the present life.



3. Agami: future actions that result from present actions. As you try to resolve past karma you create new karmas to try to resolve in the present life. If not resolved, they go into the storehouse to be resolved in a future life.

Each action creates a groove in the universe, or samskara, which equals unfulfilled desire and ambitions. This is future stuff to resolve, in this life or the next one.

The karmic cycle equals action and the resulting attachment. The only way to be freed from resolving every desire is for the soul to realize the self. Through enlightenment, no karma can bind you. You are liberated!

Finally, the way of karma is such that it will assure us of continued placement in "bad" situations until we transcend them.

Other important points I read include:

Actions that generate good karma:

• acceptance



• giving thanks



• forgiveness



• rejoicing in others good deeds



• be happy when others are happy

So, here I am, perhaps a little overwhelmed, but I will continue because I noticed that I have already changed, improved, become more spiritual. Oh, I also figured out why, when I leave yoga, I am totally disoriented. I think it is because when I am in class, totally there, my mind is clear, no monkey-mind, no chatter. When I return to the present world, I am overwhelmed by the stimulus and unable to process everything. It takes time to rejoin the world. That is the beauty of yoga; transcending the chatter and focusing.